Be That Woman – The Woman Needed

A Godly Woman

There is a woman that is needed in the world today. And I’m sorry to say that it is not a nasty woman. It is not a woman who wishes to be loud, vulgar and proud. The world does not need women who desire to be offensive, spiteful, ugly, or unpleasant, or hard to deal with. The world has seen enough of these kinds of women.

Because of nasty women, divorce rates are high, families are being torn apart, and innocent lives are being taken. This is not to say that it is all of their faults, but the contribution that they have made to said issues is to be held into account.

It is my belief that nasty women are ungodly women. These are women who have not made God to be the head of their lives, and they go against everything God ordained for His created women to be for.

“Help, LORD, for the godly man (woman) ceases! For the faithful disappear from among the sons of men.” 

~ Psalm 12:1 – Parentheses added by me.

What the world needs are godly women. Women who don’t wish to be the head of their homes or their lives, but who desire to honor God as the Head of their lives. These are women who are the true portrait of femininity. They are:

  • Women who fear the LORD (Proverbs 31:30).
  • Women who are humble (Philippians 2:3-5).
  • Respectful, submissive helpers to their husbands (Genesis 2:18; Ephesians 5:22-24).
  • Builders and keepers of their homes (Proverbs 14:1; Titus 2:4-5).
  • Blessed mothers of children (Proverbs 31:28).
  • Holy in their conduct (1 Peter 1:15).
  • Wise and kind with their speech (Proverbs 31:26).
  • Modest in the way that they dress (Proverbs 31:22).
  •  Willing workers with their hands (Proverbs 31:27).
  • Women who are joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled (Galatians 5:22-23).

Godly women are the kind of women who know that their true worth is not in what they choose to make of themselves while here in the earth, but rather that their worth is in Jesus Christ. Godly women are real women.

Let the real women please rise up!

This is a call to you and I that we are needed. We are needed to shine our lights of true womanhood into the darkness that is in this world; to point the future generations of sons and daughters towards the holiness and righteousness of God. We are needed to teach and guide our children into His ways (Deuteronomy 6:4-9).

Godly women, young and old, this is a call to you to be that woman that the world really needs to see; married or single.

 

“Women of God can never be like women of the world.

The world has enough women who are tough;

we need women who are tender.

There are enough women who are coarse;

we need women who are kind.

There are enough women who are rude;

we need women who are refined.

We have enough women of fame and fortune;

we need more women of faith.

We have enough greed;

we need more goodness.

We have enough vanity;

we need more virtue.

We have enough popularity;

We need more purity.”

~ Margaret Dyreng Nadauld

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“Here’s to godly women. May we know them. May we be them.

May we raise them.” ~ Erica Dunomes

 

“Be That Woman” – Three Simple Words That Have Impacted My Life

 

How profoundly did that statement ring to me. Immediately my mind started to really ponder over the deepness of it. I started to think about my mom and the kind of woman she was to me during my childhood days.

My mother was loving. My mother was hard working. She still is. She always kept a clean house. She kept food on the table. She always made sure that my siblings’ and my hair was combed and that we had on the best clothes and shoes she could afford for us. She trained us in how to cook, clean the house, and do the laundry. She trained us to keep ourselves well.

We didn’t have much of a spiritual upbringing in my home as I was growing up. My mother believed in God, but we were the family who only went to church occasionally, unless we went off to stay with one of her siblings in what we called the country for a spring break or two. Then, we went every Sunday.

Then the day came that we had started going to church more frequently. It was at that time that I gave my life to Christ when I was sixteen years old. I had become a teenage parent by then. But going to church was about the extent of it. I learned nothing at that time of what it meant to have a relationship with Jesus. Going to church had become short-lived again.

My walk with God really didn’t happen until almost 10 years later. On December 3, 2006, I recommitted my life to God. Having become much older, having had a few more children, and now able to get myself around, I decided on that day that it was time. I confessed Jesus once again. I began my real journey of walking with and having a relationship with God.

This is when the scales fell off of my eyes. God, through the power of the Holy Spirit had been teaching me so much.  It brought me to the point where I realized that there were a lot of things that I was not taught growing up, that I felt I should have been. And it made me feel a certain way towards my mother for not having taught me.

In a conversation I had with my her,  I was forced to consider some things that I had not considered before. I had not considered her childhood and what it was like growing up for her. I had not considered what she may have and may not have been taught. Because in reality, these things make a major difference in how you parent your own children. And suddenly I extended to my mother grace. I took a moment to consider her upbringing. I considered the fact that just as God has graced me in the raising of my children, He has graced my mother too.

But here’s the thing. I call it the flip-side. God in His grace sees all and knows all. Therefore He is merciful. Yet, though He gives grace, He still requires us to learn in the now what we had not in the past. Some things are excusable for children who have grown up into adulthood who don’t know. But once the Light of Truth has shined, those things become no longer excusable.

 

“If I had not come and spoken unto them, they had not had sin: but now they have no cloke for their sin. He that hateth me hateth my Father also. If I had not done among them the works which none other man did, they had not had sin: but now have they both seen and hated both me and my Father (John 15:22-24).”

 

In looking back over my life, with how I grew up, to my many experiences I’ve encountered, and with knowing what I know now – after having given my life to Christ – there are a lot of things I wish would have happened over the course of my childhood concerning my mom. Was my mother a bad woman? No. I believe she did the best she could with what she knew. But here’s what I wish:

 

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• I wish my mother could have been a woman who taught her children about God; the importance of having a relationship with Him (Deuteronomy 6).
• I wish my mother could have been a woman who took the time enough to talk to her children about the things that mattered most.
• I wish my mother could have been the kind of woman to model for her children the example of a woman who builds her house (Proverbs 14:1).
• I wish my mother could have modeled for her children the importance of being a woman who kept her word.
• I wish my mother could have modeled for her children the structure of training her children in the way that they should go.
• I wish my mother could have been an example to her children of what biblical submission to her husband looked like.
• I wish my mother could have taught her children the importance of standing up for God’s Truth even if it meant standing alone.
• I wish my mother could have taught her children the value of guiding their hearts while not living by their feelings and emotions.
• I wish my mother could have taught her children the importance of financial stewardship.
• I wish my mother could have taught her children the importance of their bodies being God’s temples; how they should take care of them.
• I wish my mother could have taught her children the value of true decision making.
• I wish my mother could have been a better example of Christ.

 

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My upbringing as a child greatly influenced the way I’ve parented my own children. Especially in their earlier childhood years. I was a single mom for most of that time, and a tender babe in Christ. I had no clue what real parenting was. I didn’t get married until I was 29. It was God in my husband who opened my eyes to the true importance of parenting my children correctly. But, for me, that wake up call until the year 2012 when my husband threatened divorce if things didn’t change.

 

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It all started with this book. I was in the garage one day praying unto God and asking Him to make me to be a woman after His heart and show me His priorities for my life, when I came across this book that my mom had given me. Ironic, huh?

It only took me to get to the table of contents before I realized God had given me the answer to my prayers. He had given me guidance. And in that instant I knew that He wanted me to build my house (Proverbs 14:1). Since then, I’ve been doing my best to obey what I believe God wants me to do. I even believe that He impressed upon my heart to not go back into the work force. Since then, I’ve been a stay-at-home mom. 

I’ve learned so much while on this journey. Over the course of my parenting since 2012, I have had to learn some new ways and unlearn some old ways. Let me just tell you, it was not easy. It forced me to have to truly see what parenting was as well as what parenting was not. And let’s not mention having to learn how to be a true, godly wife. It was all a total life changing reality for me. It forced me to truly grow up. I praise God for that!

With the more that I learn as I go, it seems my hunger to fulfill my assignment just keeps growing and growing. I’ve come to realize that it is a high calling.  It has caused me to have the desire to be to my children what I wish my mom would have truly been to me. I am needed for such a time as this.

To be honest, I believe it’s every woman’s high calling. I say high because the focus and center of the calling  is God who called you. We are all needed for this great assignment.

We are needed to be fearless for God.

We are needed to be strong  in God.

Contrary to popular belief, despite what the media portrays as a depiction of the woman of today, God is still raising up His faithful daughters who desire to be women who:

  • Are single godly women.
  • Are married godly women.
  • Love Him with their whole heart.
  • Serve Him daily.
  • Practice godliness and holiness.
  • Practice discipline
  • Respect their husbands.
  • Care for their families.
  • Help the needy.
  • Walk in wisdom, purity, and goodness.

I don’t know the kind of upbringing you had growing up. In your home, your mom could have been the one to model a perfect example of Christ for you to follow. Or your mom could have been the total opposite. The point is is that we all have been given the chance to be for others what we wished someone would have been for us.

I can be that woman. 

You can be that woman.

Together, collectively, we can be those women. 

Sister in Christ, will you accept your high calling?

 

“For us to answer God’s high callings, we must look to Him.”

~ Elizabeth George

 

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When Grace Meets Honor

d69bb40339eea5397b058c09e1264772It started with a divine appointment. There I was, about to dig into the Word with God. The phone rings. I answer only to hear my husband’s freshly awakened voice on the other end.

Normally, I get uneasy, much rather annoyed when my time with God gets interrupted. My mind has prepared for nothing else but that special time with Him. Hey! That time is vital. Yet at this particular time, I felt the need to simply listen. My husband’s topic of conversation? Honor.

My husband is the kind of person, that when God is dealing with him about something, he presses in until he fully understands what God is saying. I love that about him. So I listened to him.

I listened to him explain in detail what God had revealed. As he was talking I, too, began to see understand some things about honor.
Then I thought about my mother; my teenage years growing up in her house.

Have you ever heard of the saying that if you are ticklish on the back of your neck, you are “boy crazy” (which now that I think on it, made no sense)? Well I was that ticklish on the back of the neck, boy crazy girl. I did things. Things I’m not proud to say I did. In my mother’s house (I know, kill the visual, right?). This conversation with my husband about honor had brought those things back to my remembrance.

A while ago, maybe a couple of weeks ago. The Lord had laid it on my heart to call my mother and apologize to her, for the ways in which I did not respect her, for doing what I did while under her roof. My mom, at the time, was married to my youngest sister’s dad. But they had been separated for years. It was just my mom, my brother, my sisters and I. She worked during the day and night; two jobs. And the rules she had set, we did not follow. Let’s just say that there was much disrespect going on.

Now, years later, I’ve realized that my lack of respect was really my lack of honoring my mother.

Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee. -Exodus 20:12

It could be said by me that I honored my mother in other ways. I have never called her out of her name. I have never talked back to her. I didn’t even feel comfortable using a curse word in front of her in my early adult years (back when I cursed). Yet, with what I know about my teenage years growing up and having shined in the truth of God’s word, I can say that my failing to obey her rules really means that I did not properly honor her at all.

For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all. -James 2:10

Having hung up with my husband, the call that I had been putting off………well, I made. I called my mom. I am not good with heartfelt talks which is the reason why I prolonged giving my apology. I have never been good at communicating in that way. It’s only recently as of 2014 that I started moving beyond myself to do such a thing. And on this particular day, I am so glad I did. My mother was instantly forgiving as I expected that she would be.

Honor Defined:

Honor, in the dictionary is defined as to hold in honor or high respect; revere: to honor one’s parents. According to Strong’s Concordance, the Hebrew word for honor as it is used in referenced scripture (notice how the spelling has changed) is kabad or kabed. The vowel sounds are long in pronunciation. And it means to be heavy; abounding with; lay heavily; bring to honour.

In comparing the two definitions, one could only see that parents are to be held in high regards. They are to be revered and greatly respected. My opinion from what I know about the Truth is that because, next to God, after He spoke the foundations of the world into existence He created man and woman; male and female. Other than the animals, there was no one next to Him in his likeness and image. God had set things in divine order and expected His order to be followed. He gave man and woman the authority to have dominion over the earth. He also later made them to be parents. And He commanded that parents be highly honored.

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. -Genesis 1:27-28

And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD. And she again bare his brother Abel.  And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground. -Genesis 4:1-2

In Ephesians 6:2, the apostle Paul calls this the first commandment to honor your parents, a commandment with a promise. That promise was to live long in the earth.

We live in a society today where the biblical standard of respect for parents seems to be nonexistent. Children today are not being taught to honor their parents. This is mainly because parents are failing to teach them. They are too busy giving them what they want (their way and material things) over what they need (biblical correction and teaching).

There was a lot of things I was not taught growing up. In fact, the one thing I was taught was to respect parents an elders. I was taught, that I had to do what they said because they were my parents and elders. It was the thing to do when it came to them being the adults. Yet, there were instances that I chose not to. And I reaped the consequences of my disobedience. In my adult life however, this lesson that I’ve learned, I have taught to my own children.

In view of that, things are much different today. A lot of parents have walked away from the biblical foundation of teaching their children to honor them and respect their elders. Their claim is that it’s an old-fashion tradition. And the result is that of what would be considered children gone wild. That’s why they can go to school and get into fights (fist fights) with their teachers. What’s sad is that they think there’s nothing wrong with their behavior. In their eyes, it has been made justified.

For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; -2 Timothy 3:2-4

Is it safe to say that there are some parents today who were not taught about respect and honor themselves growing up? So therefore, they can’t teach their children what they themselves have not had the privilege to learn. Maybe this is where grace comes in.

Having the conversation with my mother allowed me to consider some things that I had not considered before. I had not considered her childhood and what it was like growing up for her. I had not considered what she may have and may not have been taught. Because in reality, these things make a major difference in how you parent your own children. And suddenly I extended to my mother grace. I took a moment to consider her upbringing. I considered the fact that just as God has graced me in the raising of my children, He has graced my mother too.

But here’s the thing. I call it the flipside. God in His grace sees all and knows all. Therefore He is merciful. Yet, though He gives grace, He still requires us to learn in the now what we had not in the past. Some things are excusable for children who have grown up into adulthood who don’t know. But once the Light of Truth has shined, those things become no longer excusable.

If I had not come and spoken unto them, they had not had sin: but now they have no cloke for their sin. He that hateth me hateth my Father also. If I had not done among them the works which none other man did, they had not had sin: but now have they both seen and hated both me and my Father. -John 15:22-24

God has commanded all of us as parents to teach our children (Deuteronomy 11:19). We are to teach them how to honor God first. We are to teach them how to honor us as well. God said it. He is the One who has given and set the divine order. We would do well to obey God.

We see what our world looks like as the second coming of our Lord and Savior draws near. All that has been prophesied is coming to pass. But what if we could just for a moment paint the picture in our minds, what the world would look like should we all truly obey God? How beautiful that would be!

Do you know that you have a world? Yep! You do. Your home is your world; and all that pertains. Though it be small, the responsibility you have been given to keep it is major.

I propose a challenge. This challenge is twofold. First, I challenge you to think back on how you treated your parents growing up. If you know that you didn’t truly honor them, then call them and honor them today. Make it right by admitting that you were wrong. Second, I challenge you to take a survey of your world (your home). View it light of the Scripture (Exodus 20:12). And ask yourself do your children really honor you? Are you teaching them to honor you? What about respect for their elders? Should any of these questions be met with the answer of “no”, then I challenge you to change that.

This change will not be easy. But through grace it can be done. Let honor come to be where honor is due (according to the Word of God). It’s never too late to do the right thing while you have the chance now to do it.

 

 

One Word To Lead Me In 2017: GROWTH

December is always the month that I personally love to take the time to disconnect from the world to truly connect with God.

It is the time that I like to take a serious look back over the year and reflect over all that has taken place, before going into the new one.

It’s the time that I like to really quiet my heart to hear or discern what God has in store for the next. He is always doing a new thing, right (Isaiah 43:18-19)? I want to know what that new thing is. I want to hear what God has to say.

When I woke up Sunday, the morning of the first day of the New Year 2017, I asked God, “What do You want me to focus on this year?” This is what I heard Him say.

 

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Change is inevitable. Growth is intentional. ~ Glenda Cloud

 

One of the first things that I like to ask myself in my time of reflecting is, Have I grown this year? And I believe that if I have, I should be able to see it. In fact, I believe that if anyone gets to the end of the year, a 365 day long period, he or she should be able to see how they have grown, if they have grown. If they can’t then that rings the bell that there’s a problem.

Can I tell you something? I have a problem. I didn’t grow in the year 2016. I had moments where I was way more in my flesh than I should have been, my prayer life seemed almost none existent, and I had a hard time being patient.

Yet, I prayed that these things wouldn’t be so. I asked God for so much help. Because I wanted to please Him. I still do. And He is not the one who failed me in bringing these things to pass in my life either. No God is always faithful. I am the one who got in the way. How? I grew weary of doing good.

My span of endurance is not long at all. I will admit that. I have a bad habit of wanting things and wanting them NOW. Over and over, God has to tell me to be anxious for nothing (Philippians 4:6). And I listen, until, I get anxious again. Ha! I just had to laugh at myself. I’m so glad the Father loves me. So much so that He wants me to grow.

There are several things that God has in mind when it comes to human beings. It is that they accept His Son Jesus as their Lord and Savior, grow more in the knowledge of who He and His Son Jesus is (John 17:3), and that they grow and mature more into the likeness and image of Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 15:49).

God is all about growth. He wants mature sons and daughters bearing fruit for His glory.

 

He shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season, whose leaf shall not wither; and whatever he does shall prosper. ~ Psalm 1:3

 

To have to sit and admit that I could look back over the year 2016 and not see how I grew disturbs me in the worse way. Because as a child of God, growth is to be evident in my life. So in this new year of 2017, I have a choice.

 

Either make the tree good, and his fruit good; or else make the tree corrupt, and his fruit corrupt: for the tree is known by his fruit. ~ Matthew 12:33

 

I believe that we should always be able to see areas of growth in our lives. We should always see how we have matured. Growth is important to the Christian faith.

Because God is so merciful. Because I know that He loves me. Because He spoke the word GROWTH over me. I choose to GROW. 

 

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I will grow in patience.

I will grow in prayer.

I will grow in godliness.

I will grow in holiness.

I will be intentional to grow. 

 

It is my hope that at the end of this year 2017, Lord willing, that I will be able to reflect back over this year and be able to testify of all the ways and areas for which God enabled me to grow.

 

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What one word is God speaking over you this year? Will you be intentional to allow Him to manifest the fruit of it in your life?

 

#CompassionBloggers

 

 

 

 

 

 

How To Start Your Day – Lessons From A Four Year Old

Morning people, I don’t get them. How is it that they can get up everyday and start their day with no problem? Where as people like me struggle to get out of bed daily. When it comes the hour for me to get up, all I want to do is roll over again. Uggh!

My husband and I are a blended family. He has three sons. I have one son and two daughters. His oldest son has made us grandparents. Twice. He and his wife blessed us with two beautiful grandchildren: Angela and Antonio (Antonio, the youngest of the two, has gone to be with the Lord). Yep! I’m still trying to wrap my mind around being a thirty-something-year-old grandmother. Yet with the blessing that this little girl has been to me, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. She is the reason for my post today.

 

 

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During the past couple of times, Angela has stayed over at our house, upon waking up the next day, I started to notice that she has this little routine that she follows. I noticed it because, as I am trying to lay in the bed to get some extra sleep, she’s running down her list of questions, according to this routine, that demand that I need get up. Even today, because we kept her for another night after Service on Sunday, she came into our room asking these same questions according to her little routine.

Through my observation of her little routine, I have concluded that Angela, at the tender age of four, can teach us all how to start our day. She is teaching me. Here, according to her questions, is how she starts her day.

Angela gets up early. 

She’s four. Of course, she gets up early. I don’t know about you. But I need much prayer in this area. In fact, it wasn’t until just recent that I can say that I have been intentionally doing my best to make this a part of my daily routine. I can still use help in this area. I have to beg God for His strength on this one. Are you an early bird like Angela?

Angela gets dressed. (First question)

“Am I gonna get dre’ essed! (in her country accent that I have no idea where she got it from). I’m a very slow moving person; like a turtle (snail). At times, it may take me after I get up, until noon to get dressed. This, too, is another thing that I have been working on. In fact, I know that I’ve made some improvement because my husband stated to me one time that he didn’t want to mess up my routine. Do you struggle with getting dressed too? Or are you more like my little Angela?

Angela makes her bed. (Second question)

Are you gonna fix the be’eeed? (I’m still trying to figure out that country accent she has) By now I’m sure these are all things that she observes her parents doing in her home. She has taken notice to implement them herself. That speaks volume. I contemplated once doing a post about how I start my day. I was going to include bed making. Honestly, for me, there is a peace that comes to my heart and mind when I know that my bed is made. Sometimes, I don’t get to make it up as soon as I get up because my husband is still resting. It depends on how long he rests. But sooner or later, no matter what time of day it is, I’m making the bed if he hasn’t beaten me to it. Is this a must for you too?

Angela eats breakfast. (Third question)

“Are you gonna cook break’ faaast?” Most people that I know are not breakfast eaters. But according to numerous health studies, breakfast is said to be the most important meal of the day. I do my best to try to eat breakfast every morning by 7:00 am and before 9:00 am. Yet, because I struggle to get up in the mornings, that doesn’t always happen. By the grace of God, I am getting better, though. How about you? Are you a breakfast person like Angela? Or are you of the most that are not?

 

 

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Making her silly face 🙂

 

 

It’s quite the routine my little Angela has huh? I’m impressed with it actually. I myself am going to add spend time with God. However, Angela’s routine tells me something. It tells me that there is structure going on where she lives. It tells me that she is paying close attention. It tells me that it’s something she wants. Not only wants but expects. And rightly, at her age, I think she should. For her, it is training her at a young age. Imagine that this routine sticks with her throughout the rest of her lifetime here on earth. She will be the very example of Proverbs 22:6.

 

Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. 

 

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